Kairos Moment Wedding Films

Our Story:

Our story begins long before Ryan and I had ever met. I had moved to Kansas City from Florida seven years ago for a job in design. I came straight out of college and knew no one in this new city. I met and made friends right away through a church in Overland Park and for two years felt at home.

But after over two years I felt a tug to move on to a new church. That God was calling me to a new place in my life. So I left the familiar once again and began attending Jacob’s Well Church in midtown. I felt at home in the creative environment among fellow artists. But it took a solid year before I met anyone and made friends. Several times I questioned whether I was supposed to really be there. But every time I would think of leaving, God would confirm that I should stay. “Just give it a little more time,” I felt Him saying. “Something is coming for you here soon.”

All the while Ryan was having his own struggles finding his place at Jacob’s Well. The church was growing faster than it could handle at times. But Ryan soon made friends of his own. A group of guys that eventually became his roommates.

To get more involved at Jacob’s Well, I began volunteering in the children’s ministry where I became good friends with the children’s pastor. One day out of the blue he tells me, “I had a dream about you the other night. I dreamt that I was supposed to introduce you to a friend of mine.” And he told me the name which I didn’t recognize. So my pastor friend threw a pumpkin carving party at his house in early Fall of ‘04 so that I could meet his friend. Well, the friend wasn’t Ryan. That would make this story somewhat predictable. Ryan and my story is much more layered and I love it for that reason. That night at the party I did meet Ryan. He was a good close friend of the guy I was supposed to meet. And although romance did not start for us that night, I was blessed from that night on with the greatest group of friends, Ryan being one of them. For two years our friendship grew. We watched each others’ hearts get broken by foolish crushes. He would comfort me by saying, “He wasn’t good enough for you,” or “I thought he was creepy anyway.” And I would comfort his heart by saying, “She doesn’t know what she’s missing.” Without our knowing, God was growing this friendship into something more. He was the first person I called when I needed to be rushed to the ER for a kidney stone. He held the bucket I would throw up in and urge the doctors for more meds. He was there when I got the news of my brother-in-law’s death and held my hand as I cried. I didn’t know then that the hand he held, he would one day be placing a ring on its finger.

It took two years for God to prepare us. Looking back I know I wouldn’t have been ready for true love when we had first met. I tell Ryan now that God waited for us to fall in love so that I could be my best “me” for him.

It was another Autumn two years after we met on a trip with friends to the mountains of Colorado that something clicked in both our hearts for each other. Shortly after that trip we began to date.

We have been dating for a year and a half now and that in itself has been a layered road. We’ve had our laughter and our tears which have only solidified the bond we have. And the struggles we have faced have only grown us closer. My parents are of an older generation. Their old school way of thinking voiced their disapproval of our biracial relationship. Ryan’s patience with my parents and passion for me gave strength to our love. We have maneuvered through the difficulties of life and family and have come up against many walls that have forced us to choose, “Will we climb or walk away?” And countless times we’ve taken each other by the hand and together have climbed each wall of adversity.

Over a year we dated before Ryan popped the question. I knew just a few short months into the relationship that he was the one God had been preparing me for and him for me. But patience proved to be my lesson for the many months I waited. So finally, at the top of the Eiffell Tower at the Paris Hotel in Vegas (not exactly the city of love but close enough), Ryan held me in his arms and asked me to love him for life. And I said yes.

Details:

Our wedding date is set for April 18, 2009. That day I will be marrying my very best friend. Our ceremony will be at Jacob’s Well, our church where we both were led to be. Our friend that introduced us that Autumn night carving pumpkins will be officiating the ceremony. All the pieces have fallen together in God’s perfect time and place.

Because neither of our families are financially able to help with the wedding, the cost has been on our shoulders entirely. I’ve been able to foot the bill for the big things (caterer, church, reception) but have been relying on friends and God to help supply the rest. Unfortunately there’s no room in the budget for a videographer though my heart wishes that day could be captured on film. Because I am an artist and designer, I value so much the art of pictures and images to tell a story. I’ve seen the work you’ve done and am so moved and impressed how you capture the story of other couples. My hope is that Ryan and my story could be one day captured as beautifully too.

Ryan and my main desire for our wedding day and even our marriage is to tell a story of a greater Love through the love we display for each other. I envision the day of our wedding: us standing there at the front of our church surrounded by our family and friends, some knowing the struggles we’ve fought to get there. A battle for a love conceived in friendship, forbidden by some, pushing through and being birthed into full grown love.

Our Song:

Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol

On our trip out to Colorado that Autumn before we began dating, it was Ryan, my roommate, and I car tripping to Estes Park. We hit blizzard-like weather on the way there. Ryan was driving and I was in the front seat. I’m normally a very anxious person and worrying is second nature to me. But that trip, in that moment when none of us could see the road and both my roommate and Ryan begged to stop, I had such confidence in Ryan driving us to safety that I encouraged him to keep going. I felt such protection and safety with him at the wheel. I don’t normally have that kind of trust in people in control of my life. And he was at that moment. We came out of the blowing snow safely and Ryan, white knuckled, continued the drive through the mountains. I had climbed into the back seat with my roommate and we watched episodes of Grey’s Anatomy on her DVD player. It was one of the final ones for that season and it was where Denny Duquette had died. If you’re unfamiliar with the show, that particular season one of the surgeon interns had fallen in love with her patient who had a heart condition. He had an extended stay at the hospital and had fallen for her too so he asked her to marry him. But before they could marry, he grew worse and died. Lizzy, the intern, still in a party dress from right before his passing, now laid on her bathroom floor mourning her love’s death. At that moment Snow Patrol’s song Chasing Cars was playing in the background. “If I lay here, if I just lay here, will you lie with me and just forget the world?” The lyrics reflected the moment beautifully of her laying on the floor mourning her loss. And I bawled my eyes out in the backseat watching it.

What I didn’t know was my heart was falling for the man in the front seat and he was falling for me. One night on that trip, Ryan and I sat on the back porch surrounded by mountains just watching the stars. It felt good and safe to just be with him. He confessed to me later that he wanted to kiss me that night. I think it was good for our hearts to walk slowly towards love’s perfect timing. But our song always reminds us of that weekend where we both can pinpoint our hearts moving towards a new direction. Ryan has been my best friend. He makes me laugh hard enough to grab my inhaler. And he’s holds me tighter than anyone as I’ve cried. At moments we, like the song says, “… don’t need anything or anyone, we’ll do it all, everything on our own.” We’ve clung to each other when some have tried to pull us apart proving our love more true to ourselves and the world. “I don’t know where, confused about how as well. Just know that these things will never change for us at all.” I know where my heart began to change, I still don’t exactly know how it went from friendship to love, but I know this: our love is forever.

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